Understanding Relational Trauma

Most people can identify at least one relationship that has impacted them in a negative way throughout their lifetime. But have you ever wondered if you’ve experienced relational trauma? So what is the difference between a bad relationship and relational trauma? Today we will take the time to explore this topic together.

So what is relational trauma?

So let’s start out by defining trauma. Trauma is any life circumstance that overwhelms one’s ability to cope and make sense of the events that are occurring at that moment. These overwhelming experiences are associated with a specific nervous system response.

 Relational trauma is when trauma occurs in the context of a relationship. There are various degrees in forms of relational, trauma, and various contexts for relational trauma. Relational trauma can include various forms of abuse, neglect, or abandonment. It can also occur in almost any type of relationship, from a romantic or intimate partner relationship, parenting relationship, or even work relationships with bosses or coworkers. If human connection is involved, the potential for relational trauma to occur exists.

How does relational trauma occur?

Relational, trauma and abuse can occur anytime there’s an imbalance in power in a relationship, or an abuse, or misuse of the power dynamics that exist within relationships. These imbalances in power occur when the individual with greater power uses that power for control, manipulation, coercion, or the inflicting of harm on another individual. 

How common is relational trauma?

Well, this is a challenging question to answer. Specifically, there are many things that we do know about the rates of relational trauma. For example, 60% of adults report, suffering abuse, or experiencing some kind of abuse or trauma as a child (1). It is estimated that worldwide up to 30% of the population has or will experience trauma or violence in the context of an intimate partner relationship (2). And close to 23% of employed persons, worldwide report, having experienced violence, harassment, abuse, or trauma in the workplace (3).

As human beings, we are in constant connection with others, so relationships as an avenue for trauma, simply makes sense, unfortunately. 

If I have experienced relational trauma, what can I do about it? 

Great question! The great thing about trauma is, trauma is repairable and recoverable. And while these traumatic events will never necessarily go away, we can assist our bodies and brains, re-process these traumatic incidences, and assist our nervous system in reducing those traumatic responses. There are many evidence-based and effective trauma interventions. EMDR therapy, DBT therapy, trauma-focused CBT therapy, and others are researched and validated interventions to assist in reducing trauma symptoms and healing trauma exposure.

If you are interested in learning more about trauma therapy, have considered finding an EMDR therapist, or would like a professional to help you evaluate different relationships that have impacted you in significant ways, a member of our team would love to help you. We employ highly trained trauma-informed therapists and offer online therapy options, as well as in-person therapy options at our Arlington, Texas-based therapy group.